Helenka, Queen of Outer Space

As if my regular problems weren't enough, yesterday I was hit with a debilitated body. The customary muscle lock locations were quiet - for once - but everything had been slammed with weakness and pain: the lower back, glutes, thighs, calves, and both ankles (even though it's normally been the fractured one) were in screaming pain and I couldn't even get in or out of bed, or my chair, without using my cane. And, when I walked (still with a cane which I've never needed inside my unit), I could only shuffle to be sure I wouldn't trip. I'll ask Sarah for a recc of where I should go. She's a great resource, having had a horse fall on her and crush her pelvis.

The only good thing yesterday is that I decided to double my donation to the blind group. The Pres was just flabbergasted and expressed his thanks this morning.

Obviously, this unexpected pain has made it almost impossible to be swayed by distractions such as TV, etc., but I have watched my usual shows and spent most of the time in bed which isn't restful either, not when both ankles are falling asleep. Sigh.

Anyway, I'm too tired to bitch any longer. So just imagine me exploding 2020 with extreme prejudice!

Even worse with temperature fluctuations. Last night, I was so cold, I was shivering and my teeth actually were chattering. It made no sense as I was cocooned in my woolen capelet.

Today I went through a feverish spell which was equally baffling, but I turned the heat off. To add to the yuckiness, I threw up. Sigh. So, it seems the only thing I can keep down is SuM's homemade shortbread. Luckily, my vision was excellent yesterday and decent today, as I've been engrossed in a multi-fandom crossover fic of over 100K words. Getting close to the end. And I had the company of my fave TV shows.

I was delighted to receive two pieces of mail: holiday cards from church-John (the first time he's done that) and one from my "Auntie Marilyn". I think it's wiser for me to thank them tomorrow - hoping I'm feeling better. ::crosses fingers:: Some solid sleep should help, too, as I've been up early reading, then sleeping for a couple of hours, then u[p again, yadda yadda.

Oops. Sorry, I nodded off there - quite often today. Well, considering I had eggnog with sprinkles and a couple of shortbread cookies for brekkie, it's no wonder I had an extended nap in the afternoon, waking up shortly before our movie night was supposed to begin.

Last night, I watched this week's epi of Disco which was very weird and troubling. This morning, I opened my two gifts from SuM and S. I guess I shouldn't have been surprised they gave me two boxes of chocolates, each from a different ::adopts a snooty tone:: "chocolatier"; the second box is actually a dessert selection.

Anyway, I took my pills and joined then shortly after 7. They served pumpkin pie with whipped cream and tea. This movie was called "Holiday Season" with Drew Barrymore; it seemed to deal with the conflict extremely quickly so it could tie up all the ends in a big fake bow! Oh, well, at least the pie was really good.

Earlier in the day, I'd sent out oodles of emails to friends and chsen family. That was nice.

Anyway, I'm going to try to watch tonight's news if I can stay awake. Merry weird Christmas to all.

Sigh. After a second night in a row of falling asleep naturally (aka without conscious thought), I woke up early but devoid of pain. Well, you just know the universe can't stand that, so the pain returned, little by little, over the hours. Sigh. So, instead of tidying up and decorating, all I did was remove the summer flowers. Before I knew it, it was time for movie night at the house. SuM, S. and I watched "The Prom" which we hadn't realized was a musical. We finished off my bottle of Hypnotiq, had peppermint tea and cookies. I'd cheated a bit and used a drop of atropine in my right eye. So, right now, I can see so amazingly clearly. I'd like to stay up reading, but my mind is telling me to conk out. What to do, what to do?

Quick response? Nighty-night, all.

… doesn't deserve to have any ink spilled in description. But it was grotesque. And I've nodded off a couple times during the day in order to make up for missing sleep.

The only good thing was receiving a card from my sis RS. Alas, because of my incompetent vision today I couldn't tell what was on the cover or written inside. I'll try again.

As diversions from pain, there was reading fanfic and watching a touching epi of tonight's Bull. Really … awwwww. Right now, I'm fading fast so had better press Post.

HPCP;ATE. lots and lots of glorious chocolate! So, Brian and I agreed that he would phone me at 5:30 p.m. Early on, I allowed (uh, begged) him to possess my computer, because my vision had colour but was very fuzzy. So he took over and we went through two sites, one in TO and my original fave in Niagara. Because I wanted everything(!), that's what I'm getting. I'll just have to wait for the free delivery.

After that, he fixed one of my issues with my Office suite. After that, I mentioned my expired parking permit. Instead of dealing with it on my computer, he said he'd d/l it and fill it out with me over the phone, then print it and mail it to me. Whew, that's a load off my mind. He's also planning to make a - sigh - contactless delivery of baked goods (by him, natch). Then we'll look at each other longingly - him outside and me inside through the window - hoping for when we'll be able to get together and travel once again. We got off the phone at exactly 8.

I had some other lovely news earlier. The blind group's secretary phoned me and said there's a $50K grant that's being disbursed to people affected by the pandemic. She remembered that I'd lost the use of my magnification software, so I should apply to get a bland new version. Hmmm.

Then, in the evening, one of the group's members earned from the Prez that the wee winter survival kits were my idea, so she sent me a lovely thank you. I replied to her, saying there are a lot of cases of paying it forward in our community and that I hope it continues.

In other non-news, I slept well (until 9:30) but was in pain for most of the day. Sigh. Watched some TV including news and am about to watch Young Sheldon. And, finally, it's almost time for pills, so I'm grateful for that.

More than eight hours of sleep in a delightfully cozy, cheerful bed did me a world of good. Mind you, I still had to stretch my boundaries, finishing off the steam cleaning of mf the bathroom and then doing a small load of laundry. I think I've definitely determined that pushing the machine and inhaling steam improves my vision.

As the day wore on, the pain returned, so I spent much of the two-hour Executive Zoom call in discomfort. Good thing it was audio only. At least I was happy to hear how pleased our members have been receiving their winter treats and our other efforts to their benefit. Just makes me really grateful for belonging to such a group and being able to contribute.

Anyway, I'm fading quickly. Trying to watch a titch of TV before bed. Earlier, I'd watched yesterday's repeat of Bull that was heartbreaking - about a respected member of society who'd overcome his unfortunate upbringing by paying it forward - establishing a summer camp for at-risk youth. The only problem is that he ended up putting them at risk - from his increasing sexual advances. The ultimate proof (after "He said" vs the only "He said" the team was able to secure) was found in cameras stolen from the man's house which still contained film of some of his improprieties. Taking their existence as probable cause, the authorities carried out a raid and found current evidence that he was still seducing assaulting 13-year old foster children.

Okay, I'm yawning and my fingers are getting all fumbly. Nighty-night, all.

… don't stand a chance, withering under the glare of a body wracked in pain. Sigh.

At least I slept well, waking up at 9:30. But, as the hours slid by, the pain intensified, not releasing its hold on me until around 9. So the only chore I managed to do was clean the large mirror over the fireplace. Make that a chore-and-a-half as the sprayer attachment was broken.

I watched TV instead, watching last night's first-run SNL that was so-so, with the possible exception of the skit of Giuliani's fart (followed by the real thing). Oh, how the mighty have tumbled. And he's emulating his very good buddy by having contracted the virus. Talk about dedication. ::shudders:: Ugh.

One of the highlights of my day was having people commenting on FB that it was nice to have me drop in, including a former deacon who has not always been the most compassionate person. So I guess I'll call that a win.

If my body would like to be compassionate tomorrow, I would surely appreciate it. Sigh. Negotiating with a hostage-taker is a frustrating task. ::crosses fingers::

All of yesterday's positivity? Gone, dissipated and spread on the wind until only a faint memory remains. The pain hit around 3:30. Lather, Rinse, Repeat - namely take pills, climb into bed and hope. It took forever. I still had sight in the middle of the night but that too leeched away. I finally got some sleep around 7. I had a granola bar and my pills for brekkie, dragging myself back to bed after 1:45. Imagine my shock to wake up at 6:45. It had taken that long for my body to harness all of the pills' essence and allow me to rest.

Spent the evening watching all of my daytime shows. Right now I need some healing, distracting of Peppa Pig. Let's hope it works.

Finally, I was surprised to receive my first Kissymas card. It wasn't from any of my church friends, but instead from the secretary of the blind group. With my vision AWOL, I can't tell what's happening. Hoping for vision tomorrow. Nighty-night.

Obviously, yesterday wasn't worth wasting any words on. If that weren't enough, searing pain woke me up around 4 and I was up for the rest of the night. Yes, I certainly AM cranky and grumpy! To make things worse, there was no N.C.I.S. because it's December and Rudolph just had to visit. Sigh.

Had some unscheduled conk-outs during the day, even when watching the news. Boo. I'm also peeved by unnecessary bureaucracy. I didn't realize my disabled parking permit had expired last September (eek!) so went on the provincial website to see what was required. If I'd actually received the renewal package, all I would have had to do was drop the signed form into the mailbox and - tada - all done. But, now, I have to d/l the form and supply copies of photo ID (which they already have on file, sheesh).

Anyway, I'm going to have some soothing rice and beans for a late dinner and then try to read more of my book. And hope for a much better night.